I'm in the same boat, but inverse. It's been over a year. bf has slowwwwly been getting medical assessment, keeps rescheduling. Overall I think it's mental, started as life anxiety and stress, then compounded with the shame of being unable to perform. We still cuddle at least. I just goon when he's at work.
If she's unwilling to at least compromise on your own satisfaction during her improvement, leave... I'm so miserable as is, I couldn't imagine being nagged for masturbating as well. GL anon:/

Get her off SSRIs and birth control.

>>34434594
I guess my question is: is this a make or break for you?
If it isn't, then sorry but you just need to accept that this is your sex life.
If it is, then you need to have a final talk. Tell her you've voiced your concerns and that you feel like she isn't listening and that nothing has changed. Tell her how important sex is to you and that if she cannot satisfy you then you all need to discuss moving on.
Really it depends on what you need. Sex is extremely important in a relationship and if she cannot satisfy you then you will never be content. This will eventually turn to resentment.
So the ball is in your court.

>>34434600
For sure I think its mental. And yeah I will confront her on it this weekend. Since that seems to be the play. And if afterwards we don't make progress I will break it off.

>>34434604
She isn't on them anymore. Was better when she was on.

>>34434610
I think it is a break for sure, so I will be having a talk. Since like you mentioned, it is already turning to resentment.

>>34434594
The two of you need to talk to a sex therapist. If she refuses to try that, then you can safely conclude things are never going to get better, because she doesn't want to try.

Stuff that you can try yourself:
- Seriously look into reasons why she might be feeling unhappy or tired and actually fix them. Simple things like actually doing your fair share of household chores can make an amazing difference. (See: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2025/mar/01/i-felt-like-i-was-his-carer-why-straight-women-in-relationships-lose-interest-in-sex ).
- Gently encourage her to masturbate more and get into smut (or porn, if that's more her thing). This is obviously the opposite of what you'd want to do for a man: for a man, jerking off more makes him less horny. But female sexuality has a "use it or lose it" quality: the more sexual they feel and the more orgasms they have, the hornier they get.
- Make her feel beautiful and sexy. (Note that this is completely different from making her feel that you desire her: that doesn't mean she's sexy, it just means you're horny).
- Introduce much more NON-sexual touch and closeness - cuddles, massage and so on. Be absolutely strict about NOT trying to turn it into sex. She needs to get used to touch and non-sexual intimacy being positive things in order to feel comfortable and safe sexually.

>>34434594
Here's the trick:
Do the dishes more as a man
Clean up around home
Give her attention and take her out on a date
Use lots of lubrication and go slow and gentle

You will have fixed the issue. Any advice other than those will delay you.

>>34434594
I genuinely want to understand what makes her want to have sex with you even though you're long term ? Like genuinely I want to understand like really, Explain to me

>>34434594
dump the dead fish and catch a live one. You sex life won't improve. Usually they withhold sex when they have an affair partner or are looking for an out. Don't be some SSRI scramblebrain's tard wrangler
t.divorced

Married oldfag. I won't claim I have it all figured out as I am still working through this myself, but I'll share my experience. I've been with my wife for over 16 years and known her for longer. Our sex drive was never well matched, and things dropped off predictably as we got older. I accepted this and married her anyway because she's amazing and having lots of sex is not a high priority to me, ranking lower than her being a good wife, mother, and person. It's still on the list though, and I am still very horny for her even though we are getting old.

Do not talk to her about this. Nothing makes a woman drier than begging for sex. Do not expect "doing more around the house" to put her in the mood, it won't. Pull your weight, especially on maintenance, updates, and repair, but never imply that she owes you sex. You need her to want to bang you, not feel like she should. DO work on yourself. If you don't work out, start immediately (the list of reasons why you should could be it's own thread) Do put yourself in situations where you are noticed by and interact with attractive women. Don't overtly flirt with them or try hard to make her jealous, but do make sure that she sees other women finding you attractive or high value. Do this while also reminding her through your actions the SHE is the one you want.

Short version: get big and strong, make lots of money, don't beg for sex, let her see other women getting lubed up for you, then make it clear you want her not them.

>>34434820
>>34434600
try couples counseling. go in and state your frustrations and that you want to indulge more with your partner and have your counselor make a specific routine and goals regarding that. trying to talk one on one wont work because they'll just disregard your feelings but if you have an objective third party there to support you who isnt friend/family then they will be more likely to listen. Just remember you are not trying to force them to do anything or push blame on them but expressing that you want more intement time with them, specifically.

>>34436802
I'm a married guy myself too, I won't knock your advice and I really enjoyed your lack of posturing and your humility in your post. One part though:

>Do not expect "doing more around the house" to put her in the mood, it won't.
This one I gotta split hairs with. And it's probably because our wives have different temperaments, but for me this works and I swear by it. And the reason it works is because I stopped doing housework when she asked, I started doing it without her needing to ask me, I just made it a part of my daily habit. This then took the mental load off of her, which opened up a window for her sex drive to flourish. And yeah, a woman having to ask her man to do things is a mental load. Which I will never in a million years understand, no idea why women get stressed to ask for something. Probably had to do with the fact women fucking suck at being direct or negotiating a confrontation. And when both the housework has been handled, and there's no longer a daily routine of her needing to feel a mental load to ask for shit, it sets the stage for sex every single time.

I also think talking with other women would make it worse, because women require feeling attractive before they feel an appetite for sex. If you make them question their own attractiveness, they will be less likely to want sex with you. They will maybe want to have sex to avoid a consequence they fear to placate you, but you will notice it will be a one-time gig, she will fuck you and then after she made herself feel secure, she will quickly give up and it's back to another dry spell. If you want to make a woman consistently want sex, not just once a week but multiple times in a week to the point she's the one nagging you for sex, focus on "setting stage", by taking mental burdens or barriers from her.

>>34437634
>Cont
That being said it's won't be forever, womens sex drive really is like the seasons and will always change depending on a variety of factors that don't even have anything to do with how desirable a guy is or how reliable. This is especially true when kids come along

>>34434594
>It started fine, with sex at least once a week, usually a couple times.
Nigga, even that's too low. I would need once a day or close to that from potential gf.

>>34436802
>Do not expect "doing more around the house" to put her in the mood, it won't.
Yes I agree on this

>Pull your weight, especially on maintenance, updates, and repair, but never imply that she owes you sex. You need her to want to bang you, not feel like she should. DO work on yourself. If you don't work out, start immediately (the list of reasons why you should could be it's own thread)
I dont agree with this because it contradicts the first part. The biggest part of why I agree with the first part is because by doing more than your fair share, or even just doing you expected share, you will get taken for granted and she will associate you too much with "responsibility". This is the main issue with modern relationships, you go from the boyfriend who is associated with "fun" because when you spend time together you are going out to places, having a relaxing night in, having sex etc. The moment you move in together, share house hold responisbilities, have kids you are now just a coworker which is why everyone divorces and becomes a "coparent" these days.

I will give you some credit in that yes you should "work on yourself" but going to the gym is not going to fix that. Having a social life and interesting hobbies that take you out of the house (which are both tied to you) will though. Its a lot of work and you shouldnt have to do it but that is the case.

>>34437712
>The moment you move in together, share house hold responisbilities, have kids you are now just a coworker which is why everyone divorces and becomes a "coparent" these days.

Nta I'm the other marriedanon. I don't see the logic in this part because when kids come along you need to share responsibilities of the home & kids, it's not even optional when newborn comes along. The woman is absolutely flat out spent physically after child labour, hormones plummeting faster than the trade towers on 9/11 and there's a screaming baby that won't stop screaming and pissing itself and gnawing on your woman's tits multiple times every few hours even into the small hours of the night. Night after night too, non-stop for weeks and only mildly lessening in months. If the woman thinks "divorce" because there's no longer fun and hard work is necessary then it means one of two things:
1) She's crazy on hormones. Ignore what comes out of her mouth until she's gotten her senses back
Or
2) You're put a diamond ring on a child in the body of a woman

>>34436802
>Do put yourself in situations where you are noticed by and interact with attractive women. Don't overtly flirt with them or try hard to make her jealous, but do make sure that she sees other women finding you attractive or high value. Do this while also reminding her through your actions the SHE is the one you want.

Also I gotta retract my initial dispute. Unfortunately this actually is true. I forgot about preselection and I blanked out on the fact that I do these things unconsciously as a man. I don't actually like that women operate this way if I'm honest. But it's true now that you mention it, every spike of sex drive in my woman usually occurred after I'd been casually talking with another woman in public (not behind wife's back, just when me and wife had been intermingling with people).

Man, do women really get their sexual jollies out of watching other women interact with her BF/husband? I don't see the logic

>>34437733
>I don't see the logic in this part because when kids come along you need to share responsibilities of the home & kids,
>it's not even optional when newborn comes along.

that's the problem, no matter what both parents have to step up and do their fair share or in many cases one does (which was me).

>You're put a diamond ring on a child in the body of a woman
That is the vast majority of men and women in their thirties now. They go on tiktok and instagram all day and see fake reels of people traveling the world and making big life changes to "spice things up" and look at their daily life and think "why arent/cant I doing that?" then they blame their spouse for holding them back and get divorced.

>>34437748
>that's the problem, no matter what both parents have to step up and do their fair share or in many cases one does (which was me).
You had to solo that shit yourself? How the fuck are you even alive man? I swear to God I was near hallucinating from sleep deprivation when newborn nuke dropped and that was with both wife and I doing fair share.

>That is the vast majority of men and women in their thirties now. They go on tiktok and instagram all day and see fake reels of people traveling the world and making big life changes to "spice things up"
I guess I should count my blessings, thankfully my wife was able to listen to reason when I told her social media is cancer and she dropped her presence on there. Didn't forbid her or nothing, she's just always avoided what I said was shit and trusted my word when I told her what was not-shit. Also helps that she's pretty smart too

>>34434594
If this story isn't clickbait, the fact that you STARTED at once a WEEK and you think that's FINE tells me that you're RETARDED and a WIGGER KEK

Your gf sounds miserable, and less like a gf, and more of an organism that uses you for your time, resources, and the comfort you provide. Women do this. When you accept they will take. When you offer the finger they'll see if you are fine with giving the hand, and then they'll take the whole arm.
You're thoroughly fucked and there's only one answer IN THIS ORDER:
Gym, groom hairs, fashionable clothes, great close up photos, put them on dating apps, chat and get that call and meeting as soon as possible.
Trust me my boy. Trust me. This works. Your confidence will skyrocket.
I'm just a fucking nigger who's been lonely for 2 years almost after my 5 years gf cheated on me. Spent the last year losing 20kg, redownloaded the apps a month ago, not many matches but I took a girls virginity and had a 2 weeks long thing with her and now we're friends, got one more who wants to go on a date. And women I chat to. What this does to my confidence is wonderful. beyond explanation. I literally found my calling. I couldn't care about anything else in this life than to meet good girls and fuck and love and kiss. I am so happy, it's like a cheat.

Don't settle for a disgusting autistic full of anxiety selfish organism who's fine with zero touch wife. That's wasting your life.

>>34437793
Make sure you don't fulfill the stereotype where you have a bunch of baby mommas and several kids strewn across the neighbourhood. Also sorry your GF cheated you man, you deserved better

>>34434594
>On top of this, she "banned" me from using porn
how can she ban you from porn? you live together and she watches you?

>>34434594
so a thing i learned was that women want to be desired, rather than to have sex.
like they want you to have that "i'm really attracted to you and want you but i need to resist" attitude, like you want them really badly but have to seduce them, even if you are still together.
also their biggest fantasy is rape so do with that info what you will.

>>34437974
The saying goes: "Women want to feel wanted, Men need to feel needed." And it's true, women want to feel like they're the prettiest flower in the bouquet, and men need to feel like the most important brick in the wall. But the backwards thing about this wisdom is that it implies a necessity for the woman to get validation from other women, and for the man to get respect from other men. Because truthfully men don't give a fuck about pretty bouquets of flowers and women don't care about the importance of architecture or craftsmanship.

That's why if a woman wants to feel whole she needs a good circle of females friends. And if a guy wants to feel put together he needs a tribe of other men to hunt and work with.

>>34436704
Someone answer me you fucking faggots

Fuck the ops who don't respond, I hope you did of terminal cancer or get toetured

>>34437793
Need a help from a nigga. How can a socially autistic nigga who stutters at times get a gf. Or is it ovarida?

>>34434594
>Think like dead fish in bed.
She is either ace, or has some mental issue that needs adressing.

>>34437974
>their biggest fantasy is rape
This is pure bullshit.

>>34437814
Thank you my man,I really appreciate it. It was a shitty thing and she's still with that person she cheated on me with
It really opened my eyes to cruelty

>>34439171
It's all about who you meet.
Definitively.
The right person when I meet them - they make me feel so good. The vibe is so right.
Through meeting girls now on apps, I understood some important key things about myself -
I'm a very chill guy, I'm really into people who have a clingy attachment style but still respectful. My love language is 1001% TOUCH. I love girls who are also into nature, into medieval/fantasy stuff, like festivals, music, cosplay, singing, all from that era and also just generally fantasy shit. I love that. If you're a gamer of any kind - I feel connected to you. I genuinely like you as a person.
And I CANNOT handle flakey, avoidant-attachment style girls, or girls who make me feel like they are judging me and expecting something. By avoidant I mean - when you give feelings, they pull back. When you try to get commitment (even a small one, like getting a call with her, or trying to set a date for a meeting) she's busy, or shy, or tells you how you're pushy.
I learned so only from the other people I met on the apps. They really help me in understanding more about girls.
But when you meet the right girl, it just feels right from the beginning. You don't feel judged, something about the way she looks in her photos, something about the way she texts you. The conduct she has with you. It's all respectful, it's all nice, it all goes well.
If it goes well and the more that goes well it means you two are similar and should definitely go for it.

Flakey bitches, unanswering bitches, "busy" bitches, judgemental feeling bitches, "not sure what I'm looking for" bitches, all those - out the door. THAT'S what they mean by standards. Not to be picky with looks, but to be picky with who you choose to let into your life.
The right girl, can make you feel like a king.

1/2

2/2

I installed the apps a month ago and as of right now I'm in a lull, I've lost or said bye to all the matches I was excited about, and I'm trying to get over the one girl I got involved with (the one who's virginity I took), but I still feel so excellent from those events happening. I'm riding the wave so to speak.
Over the last 2 days, I let go of one flakey girl, blocked her, and one political girl who we didn't vibe, but it was an amicable bye. Amongst these there are bot matches, there are very few girls that don't answer me (but they exist), and some girls who stop answering.
There is no doubt in my mind, not even a little bit, that this is all thanks to me losing weight and my photos. 2 years ago I was in a way better place than I am now with a way better mindset, when I was 106kg, now I'm 86kg and in the worst feeling I can possibly be generally, with even suicidal ideation sometimes, but because I look better - I'm finally seeing some success.
So don't let nobody tell you otherwise, gym, groom hairs, good clothes, good pics, go on dating apps, work for a meeting in the 1st/2nd/3rd message, and get a call beforehand. That's how I do it, no I'm not pushy I'm honest, we are both here to get to know each other. Dilly dallying is for furries who play vrchat all day, going out into the real world and meeting each other is for serious people who are ready to have someone in their life that they care about. So yeah. Your stuttering ass will be fine because the more you go on dates, the more you text - the more experience you'll get. But you have to resist the urge to delete the apps. It's so difficult, I feel like dying when shit goes wrong. But the more bad shit happens and I'm still there the next day and I still get matched by the next cute girl - the less I feel like it's over for me.
Rinse and repeat until I hopefully meet the right one. Good luck nigga

>>34434594
Pointing out some stuff you need to think about.

1.
> Think like dead fish in bed.
If she was a "dead fish" in bed at the beginning, what did you do about it?
In this post you don't discuss once what you did to make sex attractive for her.

2.
>However as the relationship went on it has become less and less
So, you noticed she was a "dead fish" but you didn't expect the sex to get less frequent?

3.
>some "issue" is preventing her from showing any type of sexual interest
No, this is not true. You said it yourself dude. Dead fish in bed. She had no sexual interest to begin with. You saw it. What did you do about it?

4.
>she "banned" me from using porn
No she didn't lol. You can still use porn. She just told you she was not okay with it. Why didn't you tell her you disagreed?

5.
>Is this just a situation of leaving
It's always possible to leave. Do you want to fix it or leave?

6.
>Have talked about it and she says she will try
She will try what? To have sexual desire for you? It's not something you can try to have. Either she desires you or not. She can try to help you setting situations where you're desirable like a date but that's it, if you don't make yourself desirable then she won't want to have sex.

>>34439324
>Thank you my man,I really appreciate it. It was a shitty thing and she's still with that person she cheated on me with

No problem dude, I've been there, its cold and cruel all right. My white tribe of people have a saying "Smooth sea never made a skilled sailor." It's probably not my place to say it brother, but it's not the dating apps or the casual fucks that's given you confidence even though it may feel that way. It's the fact you got betrayed and hurt that did. That isn't to say you should be glad for it, but what that big mess did to you was make you stronger, make you sharper, make you wiser. The cheating girl's betrayal wasn't the thing that fucked your head, it was all the dead weight and wretching tension leading up to it. And you done lost that and got it off your shoulders, and what's more you now witness yourself as having survived the betrayal and you notice it didn't kill you or destroy you, and that's a testament to your own strength dude. That's why you are feeling the high of confidence, it's not about the chicks. It's about you and the value you always had to begin with.

In just saying this to you as a more than likely older dude whose had his fun and settled down. Careful with the virgin girl, the one you're having trouble getting over. What that 'trouble' is, it's your conscience calling. Pick up the phone in your heart and you're gonna find out it's a warning that says "Do not become your ex girlfriend". Because remember she used you? Took you for what you were worth and bailed? Guess who is feeling that way about you? Virgin chick is. She's (you) from yesterday so, give her some consideration y'know? The shit your ex didn't give to you. That way you don't end up becoming like your ex. Cuz we both know you're way better than that bro.

>>34436480
What if I do those and nothing change?

>>34436802
>make lots of money
How?
The economy is shit right now, and unless you're neopo baby it's impossible to earn money now.
>t. working 2 jobs with a side hassle

>>34439385
Then at that point look into hormonal blocks. From SSRIs to Birth Control to diet to obesity to Ph balances to menstruational changes to pregnancy or post pregnancy. Avoid personalizing the problem too much as a man. Women personalize it too. Man feels pridefully worried he has lost respect or devotion if she isnt fucking, and woman feels broken down or less than a woman for lacking the drive to fuck. A woman can have these problems and genuinely want to fuck you but can't and she doesnt know why and is too ashamed to admit she doesn't know (they often try and look for reasons to hide their lack of control "I have a headache" "I'm just not in the mood", "I don't know what's wrong but I just don't feel like a sexual person anymore"

Biggest fuck up men can make is assume it's about attraction loss. Second biggest fuck up is if the man tries to nag or veg for the sex. This will repel her more, not out of attraction to you, but deeper into helplessly not knowing why her sex drive has been shot out of nowhere. And the more shame or helpless she feels about it, the more "sex" and the idea of it begins to resemble something bad or humiliating or stressful. And no one in their right mind would wanna have sex under those conditions not even men.

Men esp young men shit themselves because they think it's precipitation for cheating. Like she may fuck someone else at any minute. That's not how to spot a cheater. They will distance sexually as struggling women do as well, but the cheating one has a contradiction up her sleeve: She only distances from sex from (you) but she gives it to something else like porn or talking to dudes for attention. She'll say she doesn't have interest in sex yet buying lingerie and trying to look sexy lol.

Sane option is if your woman is still having sex dysfunction even though you've done your part as a man, go to doctors together.

>>34439395
whatever you do don't do that.
it's not your role. if she was concerned by the lack of sex she would already know all this, it's basic knowledge.

don't bring solution for a problem she doesn't want to consider. she doesn't deserve it.

do what you can to make sex attractive yes, but don't force her to do the things she should decide to do by herself. you would be degrading yourself.

>>34439420
Never said it'd be forcing her, if you're a solid man and you know you are that means your woman knows it too and she just trusts your word and she goes where you go follows what you say, because you're leading her as a man without forcing her, if the relationship is in a functional place that's what women elect to do. Not even out of big ego shit for the man but because women are just emotional conservationists like that, they would rather just trust a man to handle shit and she gets to save herself emotional anxiety over it. And if she's a good woman and does good by you then there's no problem at all helping a woman you love through this sorta thing. Because that's what you do if you actually care about what's yours.

>>34439395
>Men esp young men shit themselves because they think it's precipitation for cheating. Like she may fuck someone else at any minute. That's not how to spot a cheater. They will distance sexually as struggling women do as well, but the cheating one has a contradiction up her sleeve: She only distances from sex from (you) but she gives it to something else like porn or talking to dudes for attention. She'll say she doesn't have interest in sex yet buying lingerie and trying to look sexy lol.
How the fuck is this diff rent?

>>34439506
What makes it different is the girl whose sexual libido has crawled to a halt for everything has a genuine struggle out of her control. The girl whose sexual libido has vanished for her man yet miraculously it's still alive and kicking for places or people outside the relationship, that's the girl who is genuinely dishonest and isn't being straight with you. And either two scenarios are happening:
1) She is bothered by something the man is doing but doesn't have the balls to say it (women don't have balls, so expect this to happen every time)
Or
2) She is getting her needs elsewhere. If it's in the form of female porn shit, what women call "spicy books" she isn't cheating you but you are now competing with fictional characters. And if she's randomly buying thongs and upping her makeup game without telling you and without showing it off to you, it means she's got another man at her gate and she's about to fuck him if she hasn't already.

>>34439519
>And if she's randomly buying thongs and upping her makeup game without telling you and without showing it off to you, it means she's got another man at her gate and she's about to fuck him if she hasn't already.
This is just redpill shit.
Women do these because they feel good about it.

>>34437746
I think I do see the logic, though. She wants confirmation that you are a high quality, desirable mate. She obviously thinks so, but wants other women to agree with her.

Also, forgot to add this to my first post, but you should be thankful she doesn't want you watching porn. It's not her place to control you, but you're better off.

>>34439612
It’s not about control, it’s about respect. Would you watch porn while in a relationship?

>>34439559
>Women do these because they feel good about it.
Maybe but randomly breaking the wardrobe habits out of nowhere a d increasing her makeup regime is one of the classic signs. Keyword: randomly. It's one thing to get dolled up for obvious social conventions, like a girls night out or going on vacation or to a social venue or enjoying the night life. But if there's no social context for it, and she's randomly dolling herself up and making concentrated efforts on appearance, and she happens to be emotionally distant with you at the same time + she isn't making any signs of interest in you while all this is going on, it means she is dolling herself up for someone else. 9/10 times. With a 10% margin of error and there's an unorthodox innocent explanation somewhere.

It's a classic sign, very similar to when women hide their phone or tilt the screen away in a panic when you so much as get close to her and she shits herself like you just caught her taking a shit lol. If you are seeing both of these signs play out at the same time you're 99% getting cheated

>>34439612
>I think I do see the logic, though. She wants confirmation that you are a high quality, desirable mate. She obviously thinks so, but wants other women to agree with her.

Hm makes sense, can't relate though. Probably because I'm a man, I don't need people to agree or disagree about the value I have for other people or things especially not my relationship. I am the arbiter of what I seen valuable alone. I just can't relate to outsourcing my values to other people like that. I suppose the preselection women do is a good social safety net to filter out undesirables via peer pressure. But I've seen this backfire so many times when jealous girls try to ruin relationships of other women lol Females are a crazy species.

>>34436802
>>34437746
I do everything you mentioned execpt for the flirting with other woman. But then again a few times while out and about she has seen more attached so it may be true. Also I have to talk about it just because otherwise she won't see a problem.

>>34437793
A couple times. But slowly went to only once or twice a week. Granted we were not living together. I am sorry you were cheated on tho that shit sucks. I did dating apps and didn't fully max out stats but it does works but not trying to deal with the dating market again desu. Its cancer. But I get what you are saying.

Also granted, I think besides sex she is a solid gf besides libido and a few mental issues.

>>34437925
I mean. She doesn't want me doing it but I sneak it since we are long distance again.

>>34436704
>>34438081
I have no clue what you are asking. Are you ESL?

>>34439251
She has depression and anxiety. Also a bit autistic. So mental part checks out. Idk what ace means.

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>>34439352
Ok
1.
>In this post you don't discuss once what you did to make sex attractive for her.
I thought I did this. Took her out on dates, built up to it throughout the night, made sure to take it slow, asked her what she liked, etc.

2.
>But you didn't expect the sex to get less frequent?
I didn't see the corrlection. And to be frank she isn't as much as a "dead fish" as she was the first couple times.

3.
>You said it yourself dude. Dead fish in bed.
Fair. Guess I figured it was just a shyness thing. Did stuff I mentioned in number one and it seemed to have limited success.

4.
>No she didn't lol. You can still use porn. She just told you she was not okay with it. Why didn't you tell her you disagreed?
At the time I was, but due to distance and lack of any sexual thing I would like it as an outlet. Beforehand it wasn't as big of an issue.

5.
>It's always possible to leave. Do you want to fix it or leave?
I would prefer to fix it. Which is why I plan on discussing it with her next time we talk.

6.
>Try what?
Good question. I don't really know. Just said she'd try lmao.

>>34440399
>Also a bit autistic.
If she is actually a femautist, that changes everything. Here is the cheat sheet:

>Write out a list of instructions for her on how you want her to be in the bedroom. Make it simple and step by step, example:
>Step 1: kiss
>Step 2 take off clothes
>Step 3: touch me here
>Step 4: I will touch you there

Etc. and then at the bottom of that list write down the time and date of when this will occur. Make sure lights are dim and room is quiet.

Thank me later and enjoy your new sex life.

>>34440437
>>34440406
>Dead fish
Aka she doesn't know what to do in the bedroom. She needs instructions, if she is a femautist that's why she is a dead fish and just lays there. She doesn't know the chronography. So just tell her in written format. This will not creep her out, it will not scare her off. It will shock you how horny and excited this will make her. Go and do it.

>>34440446
>>34440437
>>34440406
Oh and come back and report results when completed. Go and do it soldier.

>>34434594
What is the point of a girlfriend you can't put your dick in?
>>34434600
Nothing wrong with him. Get down to a normal weight fatty.

Very relatable post. I’m going through some similar stuff, I posted about it not too long ago. I'm miserable in my relationship, but I find it difficult to leave.

Over the past year and a half, my girlfriend has become harder to be around. She has grown more selfish, hateful, and dismissive. She has gained weight and complains about it while doing nothing to change it. We do not have much sex, and when we do, I am not into it. She lays still while I do all the work, she quit oral because she said it makes her mouth hurt and that she’d only do it if I “went through it” as well. The whole time, I feel like want to be dead and that am wasting my life. It generally feels like I am spending all my time and money on a black hole.

I fucking hate how this entire thread is bashing you and giving you solutions that amount to you having to put in effort to get sex from your girlfriend that's meant to love you. That's retarded. Instead of spending effort on getting your subhuman gf to desire you (something that's meant to be given by default in a healthy, loving relationship), just break up with her and spend that effort looking for a normal girl that actually wants to be with you.

Here you are. You are hurt by her actions. You are also in the right and have done nothing wrong, while she has. Yet you are the one actively putting effort and trying to find a solution to a problem she is causing that's pushing you away. Don't you see how stupid it is for you to treat this situation as something that you have to make changes for and fix?

>>34441630
You called someone he cares about subhuman. If you had any respect for OP like you pretend to have, you'd not have said that.