Thread #6353180 | Image & Video Expansion | Click to Play
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This is Bill
He is King of the Hill
Challenge him in battle for the right to rule this mound
Rules of battle are thus:
>KOTH and the Challenger each roll 1d6
>The current streak is added to the Challenger's roll
>The winner is the one with the higher value, KOTH wins a draw
>The winner may take the items of the loser
>To join post your Challenger with an accompanying image or description
>Choose a starting item with one of the following stats
>+1 die
>+2 pips
>+3 value
>+1 item
>After every 4 wins, KOTH may level up one of their items (essentially a +1 of the item)
>2 items can be held at a time
Other caveats:
>An orderly queue: every challenger will be gone through in order of appearence, bar consecutive submissions by the same poster
>The creator of the current KOTH may choose to continue to roll for their champion
>OP will roll in the creator's stead if they do not respond to a challenge within 24 hours, but will not pick up any items or upgrade them
>The creator may take back control of their character at any moment, and upgrades will be refunded
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Rolled 6, 3 = 9 (2d6)
>>6353180
Dangit Bill I will show you how to make a king of the Hill.
>Sells propane and propane accessories, proud family man.
>Item propane, clean burning fuel. Is pro-pain
>+1 die
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Looks like Bill got himself some high grade Texan product on his hands
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>>6353233
Sneed approaches the hill with intent to kill!
>Overalls (+3 value)
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>>6353244
Bill prevails even with the streak advantage against him providing a +1 to the farmer's roll. Bill chooses not to undress Sneed in this instance...
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Rolled 3 + 3 (1d6 + 3)
>>6353180
Behold, you are challenged by the might of ANGEL SUMMONER! A well-balanced Superhero with the power to summon an infinite number of immortal, potentially invisible heavenly superbeings to do his bidding.
>Item: Infinite horde of Invisible Angels (+3 value)
>Also Pictured: BMX Bandit, technically a fellow Super who does... BMX stunts of no applicable value.
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>>6353266
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Seems like Bill still prevails
The propane tank is running out of gas, so Bill invests in imperishable resources.
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>>6353578
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Bill has put up couple pounds, but that is typical for the season
He has also attained the 4th victory atop his mound. This allows him to upgrade his Crown (+2 dice). He also picks up the top hat, it'd be rude not to.
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Rolled 1, 5 = 6 (2d6)
>>6353609
Here comes the Mushroom man
>Item: Mushroom spores (+1die)
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The mushroom has been overcome. Bill doesn't feel so good after a cocktail of boar meat and mushroom spores, but his tale continues on.
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>>6353792
An old, white pink wizard does enter the fray;
he'll probably lose and he looks kind of gay.
He thinks Bill has overextended his stay,
so he's doing his best to make him go away.
>Hello Kitty patch (+3 value)
[how does +2 pips work btw?]
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The Wizard joins the gray beard heaven with the Angel Summoner
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Rolled 1, 3 + 6 = 10 (2d6 + 6)
Morvanth The Manticore approaches Bill, armed with The Manticore's Venom (+1)
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The Manticore has been felled.
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Rolled 4, 3 + 7 = 14 (2d6 + 7)
Knab The Goblin 'found' this Delver's Sword (+1 die) and approaches the hill... He went to college with Morvanth, and is possessed by his desire for bloody revenge.
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The Goblin joins his comrade in the pile.
Bill proceeds to upgrade his crown once again.
If things keep going too much in Bill's favor, I may end up having to spice things up.
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Rolled 6, 2 = 8 (2d6)
>>6353966
>Weilding his King-of-the-hill-inator (+1 extra die) Heinz Doofenshmirtz approaches Bill
"You see, as a kid I never got to play king of the hill since not only was my only friend a balloon, I had to stand in front of our yard dressed as a gardengnome. Meanwhile my brother was the neighborhood reigning champion."
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>>6354106
>8+8=16>15
The unthinkable has happened, DOCTOR DOOFENSHMIRTZ TAKES THE HILL FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFE
Seems like KOTH is in his blood.
Now giving him the crown would be the most rational thing but I'll let Doof decide what to take from Bill if anything at all.
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>>6354296
The battlefield is cleared of the previous corpses as Dr. Doofenshmirtz takes the hill for himself. The King-of-the-hill-inator is presumably off screen and yet to be destroyed.
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>>6354302
"I am Sensei Hot Pot... I wear The Urn of Undeath (+3 Value), and I have come to claim Bill's Hill..."
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>>6354302
Behold, the King-of-the-hill-inator!
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>>6354327
Off to a start. Doof is still free to take Hot Pot's loot if they so wish until the next challenger shows up.
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I am Jaime Lannister, and I have come to swear fealty to the King Doof en Shmirtz, first of his name, Protector of the Hill and Creator of the King-of-the-hill-inator.
Though they name me Kingslayer, I seek nothing more than an oath to keep. If you would have me, King Doof en Shmirtz, I would serve as your Hillsguard and protect you from all foes who seek your death... or die trying.
With me, I bring my family's Valyrian Steel longsword, Brightroar, which has been recovered from the Land of Always Summer and the Ruins of Old Valyria. (+1d6)
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>>6354350
What an intriguing offer. Now I do have to caution that accepting this would require evening the playing field a bit for the challengers in some way, although not to diminish Jaime's assistance to detrimentality.
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>>6354357
It would actually make sense, I think. Right now (5d6 vs d6+x+1) the KOTH has to roll extremely low while the challenger has to roll decent at the least. A middleman could ease that a bit.
Sadly seeing someone choose pips or even moreso +1 item still is highly unlikely, given the probabilities. Not sure how that could be amended.
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>>6354414
Perhaps after a couple wins challengers could start out with two starting items. Since they already benefit from having the win streak advantage I think this should be slower than the KOTH upgrades.
Now as for having another person assisting KOTH I'm thinking that challengers could either start out as a duo or double win streak value addition.
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Rolled 2 (1d6)
>>6354350
I'm Bug Dress, faithful servant of Lady Stonehearth. I challenge you to avenge Milady's family! Die, Kingslayer!
Equipped with Cookie the normal girl(+1 die)
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All right, while Jaime is in play I'll allow for challengers to appear as duos or to double the streak effect in their rolls. Given the precedent set by Jaime and Bug Dress, each combatant will roll separately and sequentially, so a challenger would have to roll twice first against Jaime and the Doof in this instance. Same goes with double challengers, where the first of the duo rolls first and then the second one if the first one fails. Jaime is free to loot Bug Dress' items if he chooses.
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All right, the Girl is equipped by Jaime.
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Rolled 1 + 3 (1d6 + 3)
>>6354735
Lay-me the Kinkslayer? Let's see who get laid tonight and if you can slay a Dink too!
Dink the Clown, courtesy of Vinnie Mac's biggest brainfarts, enter the arena on his
>Clown Car (+3 pips)
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4 wins for Doof thus far. This means he's free to upgrade his gear.
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>>6355326
The thing is running better than ever.
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Rolled 4, 2 = 6 (2d8)
>>6355422
>DOOBEEDOOBEEDOOO DA DOOBEDOOBEEDOO DA
ITEMS:
Agent P's hat: +2 pips
Grappling hook: +1 die
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>>6355706
Perry misses by one! (but who gave him two starting items?)
Doof prevails once more. Perry seems to have vanished without a trace... And suddenly there's some other platypus here.
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>>6355706
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Rolled 8, 1 + 5 = 14 (2d8 + 5)
>>6355836
Carrie White, Prom Queen,
trying to become queen of the hill too!
Prefers to fight Jaime first, but will take anyone on.
>Prom Night Dress (+1d6)
>Pig's blood (+2 Pips)
>Streak bonus +5 (less for Jaime?)
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>>6356402
Shouldn't Doof get another d6 (1 standard, 3 for the crown, 2 for the KOTHinator)?
If you don't roll another one (or get a 1), she will grab the crown and ditch the dress (or replace it with some other no-bonus dress) while keeping the pigs blood on her.
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Well as far as I see it the doubled streak bonus still applies since Jaime is on the hill. This'd make Carrie the new Queen, although I suppose it'd be fair for Jaime to still to be able to roll to defend his liege if he shows up.
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>Don't pick anything from Jaime
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>>6357452
The king has been dethroned!
From now on, two starting items are permitted.
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>>6357458
"Curse you, Carrie the teenage girl! Huh, if I had a nickel for every time I said that or at least something very similar, I'd have two nickels. It isn't much but it is weird that it happened twice."
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Is that the corpse of Jaime Lannister? Hah!
This hill doesn't look that hard to take. With my trusty hounds (+1d) and Sir Twenty of House Goodmen (+1d) at my side, it'll fall just like Winterfell.
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Sir Twenty of House Goodmen, First of His Name, Champion of the Andals and the First Men
01/12/26(Mon)06:26:21 No.6357516
01/12/26(Mon)06:26:21 No.6357516
Sir Twenty of House Goodmen, First of His Name, Champion of the Andals and the First Men 01/12/26(Mon)06:26:21 No.6357516▶
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Rolled 1, 1, 1 = 3 (3d6)
>>6357515
My lord, you forgot to roll.
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Rolled 1, 4 + 3 = 8 (2d8 + 3)
What's that? A Whitemane Under Hunter from the long forgotten Minor Xenos Quest Redux with his War Yoyo (+2 Pips) and a Lunar Dahu Mount (+1d) are raiding the hill!
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>>6357545
Ramsay goes down
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>>6357644
If I understood it correctly here >>6353181 one can usually only hold two items and this one adds an additional item slot.
Sadly if it also uses up one the jet gain is zero and even if it did actually provide an extra one, there's not much sense in taking it as a contender (unless the streak bonus is absurdly high) and the KOTH can't take a new item afaik.
Maybe KOTHposter will introduce it as a special bonus or sth like that, who knows.
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Actually I think what I'll do is that for contenders +1 item works as an item copy of their other starting item, and then adapts it's intended function for the KOTH. It would start out pretty useless, but you could upgrade it to gain an extra slot.
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It's me, Aether, the protagonist of hit character collection game Genshin Impact. You probably know me from the absurd amount of hentai that exists for all the female characters. I'm the camera guy, a connoisseur who specializes in getting all the best angles for the viewer's enjoyment.
But that's just the side gig.
The main job's being your friendly neighborhood murderhobo, beating the crap out of indigenous masked demon-fiends and seeking the truth of this world. Since I don't buy the whole "my spaceship's AI has been terraforming this planet" because that's stupid, I'm still looking out for new clues. Maybe conquering this hill will lead me to it.
I'm bringing my ever reliable Dull Blade (+1d) and my Emergency Food. Well, really, my Emergency Food is just following me around because she gets anxious when I leave her, and as annoying as she is I can't say no to that face. Besides, she helps manage my inventory (+1 item, copies the Dull Blade for +1d).
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Rolled 3, 6, 5 = 14 (3d6)
Traveler, you forgot to roll! Seriously, what would you do without Paimon?
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The emergency food has been snatched by Carrie!
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Rolled 2, 5, 6 = 13 (3d6)
My name... is Oliver Queen. I spent five years on a hellish island with only one goal: survive.
Now I've returned to root out the corruption that infests my city... starting with this hill!
(Bow and Boxing Glove Arrow for +2d)
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Ollie misses the shot and joins the pile of men beaten by Carrie.
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Rolled 6, 6, 5, 5 = 22 (4d6)
>>6358556
Hehehe... poor girl, covered in pig blood. Let me take you of that dress ASAP... *licks his lips in a suspicious way*
Items
Chloroform +1die
Rope: +1die
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Rolled 1, 6, 5, 1 = 13 (4d10)
[anon rolled high and steak bonus would've been 5 anyway, so I'll accept the 22 as target number - but yeah, should've been 1d+2d+5]
Finally, somebody sees the condition I am in and wants to help! I wonder why Paimon taps me on the shoulder all the time though? If you're tricking me, you will pay!
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>>6358622
No, you shouldn't be so trusting!
Paimon thinks this guy is bad news... Paimon saw him in some of the films that Traveler made when Mona was short on mora...
(Off in the distance, Aether can be seen hanging upside down from a tree, his camera over one eye as he gives the Respectable Gentleman a thumbs up.)
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>>6358622
-PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP- "GET PREGNANT, GET PREGNANT WITH MY CHILD, YOU DAMN BRAT!"
"Fweew, that brat sure milk me dry... Why are you still here, Bloody Girl? Can't you see I'm trying to impregnate this fairy thing! Go away!"
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>>6358630
Hold on, hold on, hold on! This is a blue board! Traveler was allowed to allude to that sort of thing happening off screen, but you can't just do that while the Mods are watching! What if they drop a Nail of Threadbanning upon it.
(Aether calls out from the distance, camera rolling: "Same rates as last time, old timer?")
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Rolled 4, 7 = 11 (2d8)
Lining up the challenger : Generic Human Fighter!
Items: Longsword (+1d)
Helm (+2 pip)
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>Paimon got pumped and dumped
many such cases!
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>>6358887
Paimon thanks you for saving her from the fate of becoming an unwilling Paimom... UNLIKE A CERTAIN SOMEONE WHO WAS JUST RECORDING WITH HIS CAMERA!
(Aether just gives her a thumbs up. Knight x Squire Romance is good too.)
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Rolled 4, 3, 2 = 9 (3d6)
>>6358887
Ginko was told that there was someone here who is so strong that she might die! Let us have a good fight. Glory to the winner, and an honorable death to the loser!
Ginko brings her Katana and her Iron Bow for +2d in total!
>>6359055
"Wait, it wasn't a dangerous day when Traveler's hefty friend used her as his Paimonahole! HOW!?"
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The two warriors clash but the King prevails!
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>>6359121
>Be me
>Human Fighter
>Got a cushy position as King of The Hill
>Assaulted by an Extreme Orient Wench
>"Take your sword! I challenge you to a duel!"
>Lost said longsword in the defeated ojisan fat rolls, too much self-esteem to recover it.
>Tell Paimon to deal with the nuisance
Roll 1,1
>Paimon suffered an arrow to the midsection and a sword slash, saved by her Helmet.
>ThanosWillDoItHimself.png
>Throw the crown on the bow
>Close the distance
>Supplex the harlot
Undefeated King of the Hill.
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Rolled 5 + 6 (1d6 + 6)
I see through the illusions of this vile human.
I'm sure it must be some kind of bipedal fox taking the form of a generic humanoïd to deceive us.
It will not see me coming thanks to my deployable stealth BUSH !!
>Pickaxe for extra damage
>Deployable BUSH for maximum STEALTH
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>>6359151
The human fighter seemingly cannot be amBUSHed that easily.
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Rolled 6, 4 = 10 (2d8)
>>6359220
A chuuni doll appears! She is dead-set on claiming the crown, as befits royalty!
With her chains (+1 die) and her eyes made from crystallized demon blood (+2 pips), she seeks to bind the warriors soul!
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Rolled 3, 6, 5 = 14 (3d6)
It has been 2077 years since the death of Himmel the Hero.
Human Fighter, you seem like a good and reliable man.
Let's have a bout.
If I defeat you, I want you to go court my Apprentice's descendent. Poor girl keeps shutting herself in her room, a man like you could get her some sunshine... and ensure that there's another generation of Stark and Fern's descendants for me to dote on. I'll spend a decade or so turning this hill into the ideal playground for them.
If you defeat me, I'll give you the two special items that I brought with me. One of them is a collaborative work between myself and Lady Serie, a grimoire containing every slur for those filthy predators that mimic human appearance and speech patterns named 'Demons' (+1d). All of them, from all throughout human history, we were quite thorough. As for the other... it pains me to think of parting with it, but I'll give you my limited edition Aura head (+1 Item).
"Frieren, what the FU-"
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>>6359278
The bounty of the king is lavish as ever
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>>6359301
Damn, you've got hands Human Fighter. Haven't seen a sword form like that since Himmel the Hero.
Anyways, here's the Grimoire, and... [Aura, say hello to Human Fighter]
"Hello."
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>>6359479
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Rolled 7, 4 + 5 = 16 (2d8 + 5)
>>6359480
Oh no, Worf's been afflicted with protomorphosis, activating his ancestors' territorial aggression! He wants that hill!
He's equipped with:
>Crustacean claws (+1 die)
>Space-testosterone (+2 pips)
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>>6359568
How does he do it?
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>>6359595
POW!
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Rolled 4, 5, 1 + 7 = 17 (3d6 + 7)
A pixelated puppy is looking for a hooman...
>2nd head (+1d)
>3rd head (+1d)
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Cute doghead
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Rolled 2, 1, 6 + 8 = 17 (3d6 + 8)
Fighter.
You have grown powerful through your many battles. The Fast Bastard. The Samurai. The Pixaxe Warrior. The Doll. The Elf from the Future. The Afflicted Warrior. The Flying Septa. The Cerberus.
All of these challengers I have sent your way that you might become strong enough to face what comes. To face the Long Night and bring forth the Dawn. To slay the Great Other, as your destiny was written three hundred years ago.
Your TRUE NAME is CHADAERON TARGARYEN, trueborn son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark. YOURS is the Song of Ice and Fire.
And I am your final test.
Should I best you here, go then to the North and the Wall. Lightbringer awaits for you, and with it your destiny. I shall plant a Sapling of the Old Gods here to spread the roots and allow you better coordination with the Greenseers.
Should you best me here, then I will rest among the roots of the Old Gods soundly, knowing that this hill shall be the unbreakable bastion of Humanity. The Great Other will not be able to take it.
>Bloodraven brings the Valyrian Steel Rapier DARK SISTER (+1d) and a Sapling Weirwood to plant (+1 Item, Mimics DARK SISTER for now).
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The warrior has triumphed over their opponent once more
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Rolled 6, 5, 2 + 9 = 22 (3d6 + 9)
>>6359676
"Mon dieu"...
Having wandered at random out of the sea, the French Crayfish is terrified at the amount of bodies littering the ground. Yet, he knows he must take down the perpetrator.
With his claws (+1 die) and his mastery of the verb (+1 item, mimicking the claws), he bravely sets out...
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>>6359651
Brynden looks down at his notes again when the Fighter doesn't name himself Jon Snow.
"Oh shit, I got the wrong guy. My bad. Good luck with your hill."
The ground opens up and the roots of some trees swallow him, dragging him below the surface of the earth. He doesn't seem particularly bothered by it. Dark Sister is left behind, and the Weirwood sapling seems to implant itself in the ground to grow for the benefit of those who learn to wield its power.
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"J'ai gagné!"
Having defeated the human fighter who had wanted to make a meal out of him, the French Crayfish picks up the crown and wears it atop his head. Clicking his claws, he frees Paimon from his employ, letting her keep the helm, buries the two decapitated heads, and encrusts the crystallized demon blood within his crown.
Items: Claws (+1 dice), Crown (+3 dice), Mastery of the verb (+1 item), Crystallized Demon Blood (+2 pips)
He now awaits he who would dare fight his monarchy...
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Rolled 6, 4, 6 = 16 (3d6)
>>6359925
Hey why the hell did you bury me! I'm a head that's been decapitated for over 2000 years. Damn elf leaving me with that stupid fighter - HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Aura brings 2000 years of mana and her horns for +2d.
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The crustacean crawls to it's hill.
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Rolled 7, 3, 8, 6, 6 = 30 (5d8)
>>6359954
Ah, I think I misunderstood the (+1 item) thingy... Thank you for letting me make up for it!
>>6359953
"Terrifiant ! Un mort-vivant!"
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>>6359973
Waaaaaaaaaaaaa~ah!
(It looks like Aura's blasting off again! Riiiiight back into Cyberpunk Frieren's handbag, where she belongs)
I was - *sniff* - I was gonna be the strongest and get my revenge...
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>>6359973
Aura is beaten once more
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File: KOTH French Crayfish 3.png (61.1 KB)
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>>6359984
The goblin won't be toppling this hill yet
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File: 75be9f376ff41f8fde1bd1b641a6c587.jpg (2.2 MB)
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Rolled 2, 4, 2 = 8 (3d6)
Oh no! An extremely dangerous beast attacks, armed with two exceptionally large weapons (+2d)!
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>>6360276
The beast is felled! The crayfish may now upgrade it's gear for further foes.
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Rolled 3, 1, 5 = 9 (3d8)
If any crustacean is going to wear a crown it should be the mantis shrimp, because it is the most awesome and bestest animal according to Matt Inman.
Super Cavitation strike +1die
Rainbow Carapace +2 pips
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>>6360413
The shrimp shivers in front of the crayfish who is free to loot it's belongings before taking on Tux
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File: KOTH French Crayfish 6.png (98.8 KB)
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Penguin down! Someone should reboot it.
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>>6360620
Cirno got brain freeze!
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File: StrahdZarovich.jpg (7.6 KB)
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Look Out: It's Strahd Von Zarovich!
He brings with himself a lot of mommy issues crystallized in a Portrait of Tatyana (+1d) and the deed of vampiric ruler of the land of Barovia (+1d)
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File: MY SOLDIERS.jpg (172.7 KB)
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Rolled 2, 1, 1 + 8 = 12 (3d6 + 8)
WE SHALL ENTRUST THE DREAMS OF THIS HILL TO OUR SUCCESSORS.
THOUGH WE RIDE NOW TO CERTAIN DEATH, MY SOLDIERS DO NOT BUCKLE OR FALL.
MY SOLDIERS PUSH FORWARD.
MY SOLDIERS SCREAM OUT.
MY SOLDIERS RAAAAAAAAAGE!
Erwin charges to certain doom against the French Crayfish, bringing with him HIS SOLDIERS (+1 Item, mimics HIS INDOMITABLE WILL) and HIS INDOMITABLE WILL (+1d)
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File: KOTH French Crayfish 8.png (114.9 KB)
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>>6360844
Strahd stumbles off of the side of the hill!
It is once more upgrade time for the crustacean king.
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>>6361189
Its actually +4 pips now
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File: Queen of Floof.jpg (1.9 MB)
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Rolled 1, 6, 2 + 9 = 18 (3d6 + 9)
The Fluffy Servant and world's biggest thot approach the Hill with questionable intent!
She has her sparkly crown and floofy coat to aid her, both giving +1 dice!
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File: KOTH French Crayfish 10.png (134.6 KB)
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>>6361575
and another win!
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File: KOTH French Crayfish 11.png (147.9 KB)
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Is it ethical to attack the media? Ehh well he started it.
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Rolled 6, 6, 1 + 11 = 24 (3d6 + 11)
Is this crayfish a weapon of the Tsurani? No matter, I - Tom Megarson - will take this beast down!
Tom brings the arms and armor of Ashen-Shugar for +2d!
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Rolled 11, 3, 1, 6, 3 = 24 (5d12)
>>6361629
Yet another brute who sought to claim the crown.... The crustacean grows weary, quick to anger... His reign becomes despotic...
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>>6362018
The Crayfish clutches victory by the slimmest margin!
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>>6362236
Forgot pic
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Rolled 2, 3, 4, 6, 1, 1 = 17 (6d12)
With his hard won victory, he upgrades the Crown once more, inscribing it with tales of his reign upon the hill...
>>6362236
Big nose having ass. It's getting PINCHED
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"Vultures! The man of the house has hunted some food. Lower your heads and call me the king!"
Keep
>Crown
>1971 Dodge
I'd keep Mastery of the verb if we can reassign it to be Peg-mon and if so would ask for the rainbow carapace to become fancy car paint. No hard feelings if not; it's just gonna be a soft reset then.
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File: KOTH Al Bundy 1.png (125.1 KB)
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Al takes a seat on top of the hill with his trusty steed on his side
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>>6363544
The Al to surpass Metal gear...
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File: Why are we still here, Just to hoot....png (1.6 MB)
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>>6363556
Kazuhira "Owl" Miller is here to ensure that the factory grows.
"Whoot, this hill is filled with Originium! I need to place some hazard signs, so that people don't catch the Oripathy. Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to vacated the premises immediately."
Nine years... nine years since the Endministrator went into stasis. Why are we still here, just to hoot?
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Only the beret remains of the owl.
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File: Fenrico's Almighty Porsche.jpg (51.4 KB)
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Mr. Bundy... I sense great power coming from your venerable automobile.
As a fellow man of taste, allow me to test my Porsche against it. Should victory be yours, I will cede to you your choice of the Leviathan Gem (+1 Item) or my enchanted Mask of the Dark Tide (+1d6).
Should I win... I shall claim this hill for the Order of the Deep, and bring about a paradise for all mankind.
[Epic music plays in the background about how "MY PORRRRSCHE ARRIVES!"]
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Rolled 1, 6, 1 + 3 = 11 (3d6 + 3)
>>6366053
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Tso9PqVHmE
MY PORSCHE ARRIVES
MY FADE IS BENT
THE PRAWN WAS SKI VENT
AND MEETING MY LAST CALLS TO SAND
THE THUNDER STRUCK HIM
A MOSH PEAR
HAVE HIM DRAW THE LIIIIIIIIIME
FIGURE ICE
RIZZED ON THE PHONE
GRINCH
WILLIAM DAFOOOOOOOOE
BEER
ICE DAM
THE SECRET BATH DAY
SPACE... IN GRAY
NO BEAR WELL
BUT JUDO MAN
I THREW A SWAMP BEFORE
A CAREFUL NUMBER I
KURO
ICE STEW
TO GET THEM BACK TO SNOW
SO POKE THE CHU THROUGH
I SHOULD PLAY
NOW ARREST ME ON THIN APE
COME SPILL
PRAY WITH MEEEEEEEEE
MY PORSCHE ARRIVES
MY FADE IS BENT
THE PRAWN WAS SKI VENT
AND MEETING MY LAST CALLS TO SAND
THE THUNDER STRUCK HIM
A MOSH PEAR
HAVE HIM DRAW THE LIIIIIIIIIME
PERO... PERO...
HE GOT BUGGATI
(OR A VAN?)
FIGURE ICE
RIZZED ON THE PHONE
GRINCH
WILLIAM DAFOOOOOOOOE
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Rolled 5, 2, 3, 2, 6 = 18 (5d6)
>>6366060
You must be Kelly's newest victim, eh? Go drag your sorry ass out of here kid, before the Bundy curse gets you...
[*starts singing*]
Old MacBundy had a farm
B-U-N-D-Y
And on this farm there was no wife
B-U-N-D-Y
And no wife here and no kids there
With a hooker coming over on Friday night
With big luscious of hooters and a pizza and a beer there
Old MacBundy had a farm
B-U-N-D-Y
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>>6366098
Fenrico's porsche skids to a halt behind the ever-victorious 1971 Dodge. Holding out both his mask and the gem for Al to choose from, Fenrico slowly turns to stone, a seal upon the blasphemy that rode with him.
"Even with the body perished, hope and salvation shall endure. Righteous King, please, save this hill's souls from the Paradise."
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File: KOTH Al Bundy 4.png (133.8 KB)
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MacBeth meets a poetic end
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The Dodge seem happy
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Rolled 2, 1, 5 + 4 = 12 (3d6 + 4)
Hi, it's me, John Elderscrolls here to be released for the 15 year anniversary on my newest console... your 1971 Dodge's AM/FM Radio System!
I bring with me my Bethesda Jank (+1d) and my swarm of infinite modders trying to fix said jank (+1 item).