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Anonymous
I have a stupid but effective solution to Hollywood's problems 02/04/26(Wed)02:26:06 No.217765955

I have a stupid but effective solution to Hollywood's problems Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:26:06 No.217765955 [Reply]▶

File: muppet-show-2026-1.jpg (194 KB)

>Browsing upcoming 2026 movies
>Capeshit Movie #469
>Toy Story 5
>[Popular male story] but rebooted as a gender swap
>Propaganda is so thick you can’t even see the plot anymore
>Every movie feels like a lecture from a HR department
>Realize the industry is a soulless husk

>If Hollywood is going to reduce itself to a joke it might as well go all-in
>Watching Muppet Christmas Carol
>Credits say "Kermit the Frog as Cratchit", "Gonzo as Charles Dickens", etc

>Every time the muppets do interviews on tv, everyone treats them like they're real people/actors

>Hollywood should completely commit to the bit by casting the Muppets in non-muppet movies as individual actors

>Ms. Piggy in a Tomb Raider movie, Kermit in a mundane A24 crime drama

>Everyone plays it completely straight and just acts like it's a normal movie, no sly winks to the audience like they usually do with the Muppets

>The pièce de résistance Fozzie Bear in a Scorsese-style mob epic
>Follows the Adam Sandler / Bryan Cranston schtick where the funny guy stars in a dark and gritty drama and it becomes the best role they'll ever do

>Audience weeping in a theater because they just watched Gonzo as JFK get his brains blown out as a weeping Jackie Kennedy played by Meryl Streep cries over his felt husk and spreads his cotton brains over the hood of the car

>Cinema is saved

29 RepliesView Thread

Showing all 29 replies.

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:31:28 No.217766031

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:31:28 No.217766031▶

>>217765955
Wow, you took the time to write all of that and I didn't even fucking read it. lol.

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:34:02 No.217766077

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:34:02 No.217766077▶

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>>217766031
cast the muppets in regular movies, save cinema

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:35:18 No.217766097

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:35:18 No.217766097▶

>>217766077
Oh, okay, that sounds good.

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:40:46 No.217766186

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:40:46 No.217766186▶

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>>217765955
Beaker is
Oppenheimer

"Me me me me me, me me me me me"

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:41:27 No.217766197

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:41:27 No.217766197▶

>>217765955
Just make an adult muppets AI slop with the pig facesitting every muppet in sight

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:43:17 No.217766217

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:43:17 No.217766217▶

>>217765955
Actual Muppet movies dont even make money.

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:43:27 No.217766221

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:43:27 No.217766221▶

>>217766197
nobody's gonna watch that in theaters

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:45:18 No.217766258

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:45:18 No.217766258▶

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>>217766217
Nigga we haven't gotten a muppet movie in 12 years, that's not a fair metric

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:49:21 No.217766317

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:49:21 No.217766317▶

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>>217766217
I'm really hoping the new Muppet Show tomorrow does well enough to cement the Muppets as a still viable IP

I want more muppet movies

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:50:34 No.217766335

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:50:34 No.217766335▶

>>217766221
Who said anything about theaters?

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)02:52:35 No.217766364

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)02:52:35 No.217766364▶

>>217766335
I'm talking making the effort to put a real muppet into a real theatrically-released movie

it's such an absurd concept that it would 100 percent work

Imagine Sam Eagle as genghis khan

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:09:56 No.217766654

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:09:56 No.217766654▶

>>217766364
I'd like to see Gonzo and Fuzzy in a Lethal Weapon-style detective flick

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:17:15 No.217766823

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:17:15 No.217766823▶

>>217766654
That'd kinda rock
dark tone and they're the only two keeping it light

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:19:27 No.217766883

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:19:27 No.217766883▶

>>217765955
It's shit like this
https://youtu.be/akpYCHInRhg?si=dPdU8LBZKoDyuDtV

Just commit to the bit at this point
"Oh you're celebrities FLIRTING!" and we're supposed to think it's funny because they're muppets and we pretend like they're real people

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:33:53 No.217767147

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:33:53 No.217767147▶

>>217765955
President Trump biopic starring Sam Eagle as Donald

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:45:39 No.217767342

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:45:39 No.217767342▶

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>>217767147
lmao

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:49:50 No.217767413

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:49:50 No.217767413▶

>>217765955
Are you trying to say they should dig up Jim Hensens dead body and rape it till they contract aids and that this will save the film industry?

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:53:08 No.217767459

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:53:08 No.217767459▶

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>>217767413
wtf no
the muppets can and still have functioned fine for years without Jim

the best Muppet movie didn't even have Jim Henson

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)03:57:39 No.217767526

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)03:57:39 No.217767526▶

>>217767413
anon are you not aware of brian henson, who's been running the show for like 50 years now?

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)04:00:20 No.217767564

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)04:00:20 No.217767564▶

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>>217767413
>>217767526

hey yeah
Brian Henson is literally Jim's son and he's been doing just fine

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)04:00:24 No.217767565

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)04:00:24 No.217767565▶

>>217767526
no because the muppets haven't been relevant for years. sounds like a nepo babby.

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)04:02:38 No.217767599

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)04:02:38 No.217767599▶

>>217767565
>they haven't been relevant for years
By Disney's own choice
Everyone's been wanting muppets for years but Disney keeps doing shit live action remakes and mcu slop instead

They must be pretty damn relevant if they're getting a new tv show tomorrow

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)04:14:44 No.217767779

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)04:14:44 No.217767779▶

>>217767599
The rating will show whats up. after obama it's all just been gay nigger inserts all over and propaganda at all sides.

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)04:17:08 No.217767808

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)04:17:08 No.217767808▶

>>217767779
that's why I really hope it does well

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)05:06:04 No.217768429

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)05:06:04 No.217768429▶

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>>217765955
So basically take the Muppets back to their roots
One of the more notable aspects of modern commercial Muppetry is the the pilot is now merely referred to as "the pilot" and not it's real title of "Sex and Violence"

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)06:10:59 No.217769178

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)06:10:59 No.217769178▶

>>217766077
You are all weirdos

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)07:35:34 No.217769827

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)07:35:34 No.217769827▶

>>217765955
Cookie monster has been remaking hollywood movies for ages now and only old parents like me noticed ok so your idea isnt going to save shit..now fur tv was a good show why dont they make puppet shows like that in my day it was puppets and tits and fap and fart jokes but now everything woke. https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL8TioFHubWFtW1NT7VC1WG8mH_zmZK4aM

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)08:35:30 No.217770308

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)08:35:30 No.217770308▶

>>217765955
sabrina carpenter is not miss piggy and never fucking will be. miss piggy has sex appeal

Anonymous
02/04/26(Wed)09:44:26 No.217770996

Anonymous 02/04/26(Wed)09:44:26 No.217770996▶

>>217770308
>In a recent interview where she discussed her upcoming Miss Piggy film, Emma Stone stated, "I am not playing Miss Piggy. Miss Piggy is playing Miss Piggy. Why would I be playing a literal star? She would storm out at the suggestion".

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