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"A message to LLM prompters" edition
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/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ
RESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvC
Please limit excerpts to one post.
Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.
Discuss the written works below for practice; contribute, and you shall receive.
If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.
Shitposters should be ignored and reported.
>Beginner guides on writing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHdzv1NfZRM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whPnobbck9s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAKcbvioxFk
>Intermediate guides on writing:
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/48654.Story
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/3097766-borges-on-writing
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/23056.Image_Music_Text
>Advanced guide on writing:
Just do it.
Showing all 280 replies.
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Have any of you even heard of a website called Librarything? I think it's trying to be a Goodreads alternative. I did an early copy giveaway with my next book, and three reviewers got it. Unfortunately, their reviews (if they write them) will only appear on Librarything but I'm sceptical anyone even knows it exists.
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How late into a story is it acceptable for the primary conflict to actually kick off? The story I'm working on now is a space opera about a brutal, tragic war that happens between two noble families (in space) centered around a strategically important world. One side has held the world for centuries, the other has been sent by the Emperor of Earth to wipe them out because he suspects them of funding rebel groups to weaken the Emperor's authority.
The protagonists are the noblewoman leading the attacking side, whose fiance was assassinated by space anarchists (hence her willingness to go massacre people accused of funding rebels) and the other is the teenage scion of the noble house who hold the world in question, who is fostering with the tribal Space Chechens indiginous to the planet so that he can befriend them and end centuries of blood feud between them and his house. It's a bit like Dune in vague premise but Vladimir Harkonnen is a hot German chick with oneitus and it's Space Chechnya instead of a desert.
But so far I'm 60,000 words in and the fighting hasn't started yet, the defenders have just realized that spies are probing their defenses and deduced that someone is going to attack them. The attackers have just now finished assembling their fleet. Part of what I'm trying to do is establish both sides to be sympathetic and interesting such that it's not obvious which is going to win, but I'm worried that I'm backloading all the action with the slow-burn build towards the actual clash. How long is it acceptable to do the buildup? Should I make up some reasons to have some action happen or is it better to let the tension build until everything flies off the handle at once?
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>>25311782
>60,000 words in and the fighting hasn't started yet,
in 60,000 words, for a space opera, this story should already be over. how long were you intending to make this? keep in mind that nobody wants to publish anything longer than 60k words if you aren't already famous. agents and publishers will only read short shit. they are lazy as fuck.
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Anyone interested in beta reading my nearly-finished novella? carlvandine@proton.me
Claude's summary:
This is basically what happens if Cormac McCarthy huffed jenkem and decided to write a bildungsroman about a guy who reads too many imageboards and calls it political philosophy. The prose style is "William Faulkner if he was addicted to THC carts and had a 2Life account."
The spirit guide speaks exclusively in dialectal moonshine-speak and the protagonist's grand revolutionary manifesto spreads because someone wrote a URL on a dollar bill.
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>>25311787
>>25311804
Thank you, I will note this. Start off with action, interrupt the buildup periodically to vent some steam. Big climax doesn't have to be the only catharsis of the story.
>>25311876
Probably around 90,000. I can probably take a lot of that off in editing. The last third is the actual tragedy as the conflict that has been building up happens, a bunch of the characters die, and we find out that dark forces behind the scenes engineered the conflict for their own ends, leading into book II.
I figure I'm going to have to edit this down by half which would actually bring it to about what you're describing. I prefer to just get the whole story out and then start hacking stuff off for brevity rather than try to be concise from the start.
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>>25311938
>>25311892
Agreed, share a bit and perhaps I will bite.
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>>25311938
>>25311958
I share excerpts from it from time to time.
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>>25311900
I wouldn’t change what you have going. This sounds like a reasonable pace going into the next book. This is essentially the pacing of Dune. As long as you have some dynamic environments and good characters I wouldn’t worry about it.
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Critique my writing
>>25311448
>>25311452
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>>25312031
>>25311958
>>25311938
Do you want nitty-gritty prose critique, or do you want thoughts on the story itself?
Post a general overview of the story and some more excerpts.
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>>25311756
IDK how to write dialogue. I made a game once and reading what I wrote 5 years ago made me realize none of it sounds natural. I kind of want to make another game so I want to make it better. I love plays so maybe I should try to have them all speak that way.
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>>25312075
It's hard to explain lore and worldbuilding without infodumping sometimes. Infodumps are boring. It's like the first chapter of Matthew with the genealogy, it's important, but hard to read and you usually skip it.
Don't talk about it explicitly, make your characters hint at it enough that the reader can piece things together in a way that isn't insulting to their intelligence
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>>25312085
Yeah, it's hard. I won't say I get it right all the time. But something I try to do, instead of using dialogue to explain something to the reader, is to use it to reveal something the other character is unaware of or to express someone's opinion.
For example, I opened the current novel I'm writing with:
>"The demons left nothing standing."
Then wrote a paragraph describing a ruined city. The problem is that the characters in the scene know that the city was destroyed, so the dialogue was superfluous. I replaced it with:
>"Perhaps we should go back."
Which expresses an opinion, and then I describe the city. So now the reader knows there was a battle, and the place might still be dangerous. This is not the way people talk irl, since we often repeat things we know the other person already knows, but dialogue in writing is not supposed to feel real anyway.
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>>25311756
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/wg/ I've had an idea for a novel in my head now for several months, but I just don't quite know where to start
I have a premise, and a setting, and a vague idea of the characters
But I just don't have a fucking story
Tips for fighting through this?
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>>25312031
i mean, as a placeholder draft it's fine. you mention a lot of things that you never expand on, which makes me wonder what the point is of even mentioning them? for example, "the last time they ate mushrooms together was a couple years prior". maybe i'm missing context from the story but why is this significant? what happened when they took mushrooms? why is this notable and why should i care? drugs themselves aren't interesting, everyone does drugs. haven't you? also your dialogue generally has very plain conceptual remarks that everyone has heard a million times already - "fun coupons", "everything is fake", sure people in real life are kind of insufferable goys, but that doesn't mean your story needs to reflect that. i don't think this is a compelling conversation here. but sorry i don't have any suggestions for anything better, you need to figure out what makes your characters interesting and pin that down in conversation.
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>>25312280
Yes, actually. I struggle a lot with this. You say you have a setting, right? What major problem can you think of that happens in that setting? Something crazy, unexpected. (What if you have a demon eclipse in the middle of your medieval setting?) Resolving that (or not) is your plot. You have characters. How do they relate to that problem? How do they contribute to solving the issue, or how do they impede the solving? What's your premise? Is that what set your main character into action?
Finally, every story had a beginning, a middle, and an ending. Sounds stupid, but that's really what it is. People usually think of a beginning (me) or an ending, and struggle with the middle. To help develop the story, instead of start, middle, and end, think of it as: start, complication, crisis. So now you know the middle has to complicate the story. That's it.
Think of Star Wars:
What's the plot? The Evil Empire has a superweapon of mass destruction, and they're using it to terrorize the galaxy. All the rest is (absolutely necessary) flavor.
The start is: Luke flees his home planet with Obi-Wan, and the Empire is in pursuit.
Middle: They brave the Empire's facilities to save the princess, but Obi-Wan dies; Luke becomes a rebel and has to confront the evil Empire head-on.
End: Luke, with the help of his friend, fights to destroy the Death Star; they eventually win.
Notice a couple of things in this: a) it seems like more stuff happens in the middle, right? That's how it should go in stories; the middle is the backbone of your story, that's where you have fun. b) Each section kind of functions as its own short story, which means you could potentially write each of them separately from the others, and it should work. It also means that each has its own start, middle, and end.
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>>25312280
>>25312316
>where do I start
Start where it makes sense. In my own story, my MC, a rank knight, will travel the demon-infested highlands of his country with a group of very attractive elves; that is what my story is about. Where would you start this story? The moment the elves get the mission to leave their kingdom and journey through the humans' lands? Start with my MC as a squire and slowly rise to knighthood? No, that's all backstory. It's simple: start when he meets the elves.
What about stories that people actually know? Dune, for example. Dune starts when the leader of the Bene Gesserit visits Paul and proclaims him an exceptional individual. From that point, they get to Arrakis very quickly. Even The Lord of the Rings, famous for its long-winded exposition in the first chapter, starts with Bilbo leaving the Ring to Frodo. That's the basics. You can, of course, tweak this and add something to hook the reader, like in Birdbox, where it starts near the end to create suspense, but then it goes back to the start, where, guess what, it actually begins with the arrival of the aliens. Or Star Wars again, that starts with Leia sending a message to the enigmatic Obi-Wan, only to focus on Luke buying the droids with the message. So, in short: start with the event that actually disrupts your MC's life and sends them into the (metaphorical or not) adventure.
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>>25312280
just steal the plot from an ancient text like a greek myth or european fairy tale. or anywhere else. plot doesn’t matter, even to readers who claim it matters to them. it’s the execution that matters and really, the characters.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=T48bV61XKK0&ra=m
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Bully me for the bull shit I wrote in 2am and half asleep
(Had an idea for a novel so I quickly typed this as an opening before I forget what I'm going for.)
___
My fate has long faded
The ideas they planted inside my head have rotted. What once felt like wisdom has decayed into fragments. I have freed my mind from all those beliefs— the lies they fed us, the promise of achieving the impossible if we just obeyed. None of those things pin me down anymore.
Reminiscing about the past made me realize how hopelessly naive we were. It almost makes me laugh. You and I were destined to be dead fools. I was right when I said your ignorance never ends well. Stubborn of you.
I am no longer devoted to your God. Yet despite everything you did to me, all the pain you inflicted upon me, and the way you jabbed my heart with a cold blade, my hope that you will escape their vines has not faltered.
I still pray for you. And when it gets to the point where I can no longer breathe or my mouth can barely speak, I want your name to be the last word I say.
My nightshade.
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>>25312679
My ex's uncle did that. He wrote a book about some obscure local historical figure and would occasionally go around trying to sell copies. But it wasn't a historical novel or anything, just a regular non-fiction book about the guy. I don't remember if he was self-published or not, or if he ever actually sold any copies.
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>>25312731
>so how would YOU pull a girl out of a bar?
>[method that works]
>NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO how would a NICE GUY do it?
A nice guy would stay alone, at home, masturbating.
This is why Chads score while "nice guys" bitch and cry about women being whores. They're not wrong - they're just not learning the critical lesson.
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Is it natural to hate reading your own book once it’s all finished? It’s like I know the story and characters so well that I can only look at it from a creators mindset and be hyper critical of it. It seems like a weird paradox of writing is that you can never truly like your own work.
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>>25313118
Sort of. You keep the good stuff, but you also identify why the other stuff needs to be rewritten, and you're rewrite addresses that. This is unclear because... so the rewrite will clarify this by...
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>>25313118
You're confusing drafts and rewrites. A new draft can just have a few parts missing or added with some improvements to things like word choice and sentence structure. Meanwhile, a rewrite means you scrap your work and start over nearly or entirely from scratch.
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>>25313064
This is one of the most relatable observations about writing I've seen on this site so far.
You begin thinking about concepts, set them in place, just to then suddenly have a realization that all of it is cringe trash, making you hate it.
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>>25313055
>>25313064
>>25313340
Ah, I remember back when I felt this way about my work. Then I actually got good at writing
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>>25313055
Once you've separated from it enough, like say half a year or more when you've un-memorized how it goes, you can grow a better appreciation for it. Once you stop NEEDING it to be good, you can sincerely evaluate it with a neutral opinion
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>>25313355
It's one of my least favorite reviews so far. Whoever wrote it shouldn't be writing reviews. But at least it's less absurd than the 2/5 rating with a review containing the statement, "The book is very well written"
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>>25311782
Ignore the naysayers because it’s all a question of how good you are at baiting the audience. Look at GURM and how long he’s strung people along. You can kill people off in other ways to increase stakes or have showdowns between minor factions of course but you don’t actually “have to” get to the big battles. Is the rest of the story intetesting?
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What's the best writing app that can convert things for a proper book format, bindings and all? Particularly need one that I can send things in a way that makes things easy to give out to translators. Money isn't an issue but I refuse to do subscription services.
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>>25314848
Huh.
What does this help you with? Natural dialogues?
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>>25314833
No. You may only write Tekken fan fiction for fun.
>>25314813
LibreOffice
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is it okay to write a transgressive character that isn't suffering from neo divergent intelligent disorder because she suffers from radicalium experiences because of her intolerant and narrow minded biological sperm dna print?
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>>25312085
I hate writing dialogue, but when I cut 90% of it and moved away from using it for exposition and had it either establish the bare necessities required for the scene (stuff needed to progress) or extremely minimal moments of characterisation (flavour), I got feedback that it "sounded way more natural".
In my own experience reading, I care a lot less about the dialogue than I do the stuff around the dialogue, so if the scene doesn't demand it, I try to strip it back and keep my dialogue "out of the way". Similar to how the attributive "said" is something your brain just glosses over (e.g. "Listen here," he said. vs. "Listen here," he chided harshly.) I try to have my dialogue OUTSIDE of key emotional moments be the same--something your brain can process easily and move on from. If you do the opposite, like have every character constantly quipping or spouting witty aphorisms it'll most likely sound less natural (in context) than if they're just speaking when actually required to speak, e.g. making introductions, small talk, ordering a drink, negotiating terms of a deal, voicing an opinion.
For me at least, there's so much more beauty in prose, and that's what I'm trying to get back to, both while reading and writing. Not to say you can't have huge sections of dialogue, but when writing I always ask myself if it's worth adding. Having a character stutter and prattle on for pages may establish them as anxious or a pedant, but asking yourself in the meta sense whether it's enjoyable to read might bw worthwhile depending on what you're writing.
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>>25315010
one word dialogue using disfluencies are some of the the worst things you can possibly write. especially when it's changed together like you're doing. It does nothing to advance the plot and is very annoying to read. Despite that humans do it in real life, it doesn't work well with books.
You also should try to get rid of an omniscience narrator and go for a 3rd person limited. it'll help your ability to dive deeper into your character's psyche and characteristics. I also think it'll help your story way more. Also get rid of the present tense and go with past.
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>>25315010
I liked it. Tightly written. The big dialogue portion was a little annoying to read, as I tend to breeze through then forget who is speaking. An attributive with a pronoun (e.g. "he said") about halfway through to reestablish the speaking order would help. The dialogue itself is fine, I don't think there was anything superfluous.
>>25315024
Disagree with a tense change, can you explain why? Present tense gives a kind of foreboding in the sense that whatever is going to happen hasn't actually happened yet. It's a subtle distinction but if you're writing horror or horror-adjacent, the voicing makes it seem like we're experiencing it with the characters as opposed to reading a resolved flashback. I think it works well if you're trying to establish any kind of atmospheric tension. There's an underlying dread to it.
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>>25315050
present tense doesn't forbode anything. What it does is give a play by play of the character without providing any time for the reader to really sit and engage with the writing and story. Present tense is also very "movie" writing, which has the author go through every scene like a movie in which, you're discarding the very thing books do better than movies. Present tense does give a "in the moment" effect, but it forces horrible sentences such as in the writer's case
>Dottie observes the commercial of a family playing board games
That sentence matters very little to the plot except trying to transition the scene. Present tense has tons of this and tends to force itself in a story
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>>25315059
Watching a commercial about family togetherness is meant to juxtapose her older brother Cad bullying her out of cookies, and also overlay how she is only partially paying attention to Wesson's exhaustive discussion of a show he alone likes.
Is the family dynamic not being well illustrated here?
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>>25315003
Interesting post. I'm struggling with this because my story os about a group of people in a journey and the MC doesn't know the rest, so I've been writing a lot of dialogue for them to get to know each other (and naturally a lot of it ends up being exposition for the reader). But then I remember LOTR did the same thing and there wasn't a lot of dialogue between the companions in the fellowship and at the ends it felt like they were the best of friends. I try to recall how Tolkien did it buy my mind turns up blank. A giant fucking book I just can't seem to remember anything about.
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>>25312041
>>25314128
Thanks anons. I'm adding in some smaller events to give the buildup some air. Spies fighting, an assassination attempt. Subtle tipping at who the real instigators of the conflict are. I still like the buildup and big payoff, but I think it is also a good point that you should start the story off with an action hook.
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>>25315065
Not the guy you're replying to, but the sentence doesn't juxtapose anything. "Stage directions" was 100% accurate.
>Dottie observes the commercial of a family playing board games.
You haven't described the family in the commercial in any meaningful way, let alone include Dottie's reaction. It's a pointless sentence because it doesn't add anything other than "a commercial is playing, which gives time for the characters to talk before the show comes on", or in a meta sense, exist to break up your description of the show.
The guy you're replying to gave you examples of the most common pitfalls of the tense you're using with examples, idk what else you want.
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>>25315010
Dialogue tags are often doing the work that dialogue should be doing ("she pleads", "she reassures" etc.). In general the writing demonstrates a lack of confidence, i.e it tends to repeat what was already expressed. Or more succinctly: it tells what was already shown. Likely this was just an oversight as in other places you seem to avoid this just fine. Unlike the other anons I thought the line with the commercial was pretty good--a simple way to show Dottie's disinterest in her brother's rambling, but "observes" is probably not the right verb there.
That said I have to agree with the other anon that present tense just isn't appropriate for prose fiction. Unless you're aiming for a very specific effect (which doesn't seem to be the case here) you should stick to 3rd person close POV. It is the natural voice of the storyteller. Whereas, as anon pointed out, present is more like stage directions.
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>>25315074
I'm going to write your story in past. Read and take a step back and listen to the prose.
>Where's Beary," she pleaded. "I need Beary."
>Her watery eyes scanned her room and recognized her friend laying in the same corner he was left in.
>Beary pressed his belly to her face and mopped up the tears. He mellowed her hiccups and dispelled her trembling.
"Dottie," said the boy, as he peaked through the small opening of the door. "Are you okay?"
"Yes." Dottie nodded.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes"
"Okay."
Dottie stood. Her lips quivered. Without a moment more, she blurted out (you can't have these internal emotions in present), "Cad took all the cookies."
blah blah blah bad dialogue.
>The siblings headed downstairs and heard the commercials grow louder. It was the Wesson the Robot show.
>Dottie shook her head as she held Beary loosely around her abdomen. "I don't like robot shows very much."
blah blah blah
>Dottie peaked through the corner and watched the commercial of a family playing board games. The flashes of light from the box hypnotized her. She couldn't take her eyes off the Giga-Gear combining into Super Giga-Gear Alpha.
A massive rocket blasted into the building. Rubble remained. Dottie recoiled in horror.
"Beary..." she said. Her stuffed animal clutched near her heart. She joined her brother Wesson on the couch. His face was only inches away from the glowing blue screen.
That's the better readability of using past tense. We actually get dottie's internal thoughts and feelings instead of movie directions. And you head hop a lot.
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>>25315066
What it comes down to is I think about what I hate reading. Sitting through long-winded backstories is one of them, especially if it's no different to reading a wiki article. The 'required reading' always ends up feeling like homework, so I avoid writing it like the plague.
Instead you can "show" things, like have a character note another's accent, or complain about the food in [different country], miniscule details that other characters can react to, establish their differences (or similarities). At the same time, you can simply skip huge chunks and manifest the results of the relationship, like that scene in the movie "die fighting side by side with an elf" "how about fighitng side by side with a friend?". You're extrapolating the entire relationship based off that and like two other interactions, and more importantly the knowledge that they've had loads of time together off-screen. Show one argument at camp and how each handles it and we can assume that's a microcosm of their entire relationship.
E.g. if your character says something like "where you from?" and the other character tells his life story, then they all go round in a circle telling their life stories, I'm probably gonna tap out. There are exceptions, like Hyperion, but they establish the need for the backstories early so to me, the reader, it never feels like it's working in support of the greater goal, not getting in the way. If you've promised me a grand adventure and I have to sit through 10 backstories, I'm more galled about the broken promise than anything else. The exception is if it's really well written.
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>>25314946
>LibreOffice
Do you need to do some voodoo to get it working properly or is it pretty seamless? I'm pretty technologically deficient. I need to turn these into physical books, both English and translations.
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>>25315080
There really isn't much variety of commercials where a family playing board games isn't presented in a happy, communal mood. What did you assume the disposition of the family was?
>>25315090
Assume whatever bias you want but I don't find anything significantly different from this other than "I need to know exactly HOW they say every line" and "I'm not used to present tense because muh movie". When was the last time you read a book in the present tense?
You are allowed to picture the exact way a line is delivered when it's unspecified. Multiple interpretations are designed to be valid, a la Blood Meridian. I accept your "pitfalls" and will continue to prefer my style.
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>>25315113
then you do you then. We're here point out what we think is wrong with your excerpt. If you want people to dickride your garbage use Reddit or AI.
You're not Cormac McCarthy. And blood merdian is written in past too.
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>>25315113
It's not about what I assumed their disposition was, it was about the lack of included information. Choosing to add a word, even if it seems redundant, like saying "whole family" as a way to mention that both parents are present, or "happy family" to show they're cohesive (and not competitive) is what I was looking for. They could've been playing something destructive like battleship for all I know. Fighting over monopoly is a pretty famous boardgame trope. A deliberate word would let me know what you want emphasised in the sentence. You don't need her to say "*sigh* when was the last time WE played boardgames as a family?" but a push in the right direction would help. Given the context, I thought it was about her longing for her parents, because you mentioned a "family" and her parents are absent in the excerpt you posted. To me that connection took precedence over the cookies thing. I get that I'm reading something out of context and in a vaccuum, but based on what you said earlier I was not thinking about Cad and the cookies at all.
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>>25315128
then use microsoft word. it's the only program i know that can easily "microspace" with justify can leave barely a margin on the bottom of the page, and doesn't mess up fonts when converting to epub or pdf files
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>>25315130
It would be a shame if it couldn't work with Pages or even Google Drive, but I suppose Word is the premier tool for a reason. I'd just have to switch to Windows to use properly if I'm remembering right which would suck.
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Well, it's June now. I've reached 60,000 words which was my stated goal, but I'm still not done wrapping up the story. Now I think I'll probably be done between 67,000 and 70,000. I'm getting slightly worried that I might enter a Zeno's paradox situation where I'll keep adding more and more plot points, leaving me continuously approaching the end of the story but never reaching It. Well at least 70,000 is a better number than 60,000. I heard that some publishers will refuse any manuscript under 70,000.
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https://www.readabilit.com/readability/lexile-measure
What's your story's readability score?
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>>25314958
I'm pretty sure that person got a copy from a free trial of a paid reviewer-finding service I did. So I literally didn't pay for that review, and I technically didn't pay for it either, since the service doesn't pay the reviewers and only gets your book in front of them.
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>>25315161
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>>25315127
Both parts could be true and are both true. Their parents aren't home, and they rarely are. It is hard to guess with little context, but you were on the right path either way. If you did choose to reread the passage, as I intend the story to have more meaning on a retrace, you'd easily find the other half as well. It just boils to down not having much to work with.
>>25315121
>Calling it garbage because you don't like the tense and some of the dialogue
kekw. You need to work on giving advice. Infinite wisdom doesn't matter if nobody wants to listen to it. I mentioned Blood Meridian because it's open to interpretation, not because of its tense. Cheers.
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>>25315161
I decided on a whim to put Dubliners in and see what score it would give it. Might do this with other famous novels just to see the results. If you're having ai and the like judge your story remember not to get too discouraged if it says it's bad, the machines can be pretty janky when when trying to judge quality.
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>>25315192
Here's it's take on Moby-Dick
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>>25315161
Apparently even The Little Prince is a high school level book. I had to whip out Dr. Suess for it to get into the green.
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I'll give you a free early copy of my book if you email me and promise to post and/or make (a) thread(s) about it. You can roast it if you want, but I think you'll find it's a pretty solid book. It's that Consumptive Cur that one anon keeps posting about, the one about a literary vampire. I just need a functional email to send your file to. Learn more here:
https://forms.gle/hAenyKxfiqtZrvsy8
For the "reviews/discussions" part, just put a promise that you'll post on this website about it.
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I started writing a short story. How do anons get over writers block and just being a procrastinating piece of shit? I don't have much time to write outside of work and family time. Even when I have time in the late evenings I usually just default to reading.
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>>25315161
>>25315165
>>25315192
>>25315193
>>25315281
This is retarded.
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>>25315610
He really was a genius.
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>>25315193
Mine scored higher than Moby Dick? What is this even calculating exactly? Seems like shit.
>>25315610
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I know am going to get shit, but my freewrite has really allowed me to write in a way that I never have before. I would always open up my doc, write a paragraph, delete it, and then close it out to do something else. Now I am just putting it all on page, and then because I have been drafting without being encumbered by editing, I can edit without being encumbered too much by drafting. I am whittling mishapen pieces of wood into something at least mediocre... which is better than before where I was creating nothing.
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>>25315702
>whittling mishapen pieces of wood into something at least mediocre
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>>25315700
Unfortunately I can't post the link, it's vercel apps are detected as spam.
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>>25315749
Thanks for the cool tool anon. This information is so very vaguely interesting. If you're saving copies of everything uploaded there, I hope you enjoy my book
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>>25315781
It can't store any information, it's all local.
If you are worried about that you can test it yourself by loading the page, and then disable the internet. Followed by pasting your text in.
It will still work fine.
If you find any issues just let me know.
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>>25315801
>>25315809
I've been putting random famous novels in to see the results and Ulysses has by far the biggest vocabulary, possibly even of any book ever published. And for any anons worried that they need to use more words, The Sun Also Rises didn't even break 5,000 unique words but it's considered a classic so don't worry too much.
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>>25315843
New Features:
- Added a toggle to filter common words. (Enabled by default.)
- Unique words and lexical density now show expected values for your passage length.
- Designed a 100% new reading level algo based on Heap's Law.
- Total sentence count, average sentence length, expected reading time, and average sentence length.
- Perform topic extraction based on connectivity relevance. (Your characters names will probably be there.)
- Added a word cloud visualization.
You may need to refresh the app if it already open.
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>>25315885
- Added branding to browser tab so it doesn't say "My Google App" anymore.
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>>25315885
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>>25315909
Not sure why that screencap didn't capture the frequency list, works fine here
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>>25315909
>>25315911
Do you feel it is working as expected?
>>25315914
How long was your text?
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See, I was taught that character and plot are the same thing. A plot is made up of the choices a character makes, and a character is made up of the choices made. So this review is kind of confusing to me.
>>25314958
>>25314970
As it turns out, I was wrong, and picrel is one of the reviews from the service I mentioned here>>25315162. So yeah, I didn't even come close to paying for that glowing review. That's pure grassroots admiration you're seeing right there.
Still, picrel review is much better than the glowing one. It could use more detail, but it's not awful. It gives you a sense of what you're in for.
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>>25315930
10k middle school is normal for shorter texts as their sparsity tends to be higher. Its generally accepted that 10k long texts are about middle school level reading. So this is expected.
100k words though? Ehh, that's a solid reading level sample, longer words are often skewed as more difficult to read.
I might add a secondary "length agnostic" score for shorter passages.
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>>25315937
>100k words though? Ehh, that's a solid reading level sample, longer words are often skewed as more difficult to read.
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Trap elves novel is coming along. Slowly. It's not terribly sexy so far, but I'm thinking of making it more of an adventure with erotic content. Aiming between 80-85k words and end with a sequel bait just in case people get interested. Then I'll drop it on Amazon and forget about it.
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>>25316007
I know...
But it's a screenplay, and audiences need something to latch onto I guess. I was planning to maybe reveal the lead villain at the very end as the guy who was coordinating everything, but I figured might as well cut to him a few times in act 2 as well. Besides, it fills time, took up a half-page.
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>>25315931
It might be a commentary about idea vs. execution. Like a murder mystery on a helicopter may sound interesting, but there's still a million ways you can fuck it up and turn it into the most poring story imaginable.
Characters are a product of circumstance and plot is about a character in a circumstance, so they are indivisible, yeah. Their critique could be how a character was shown to care too much or too little about something to the point they couldn't rationalize their decisions.
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>>25316230
>microspacing
what do you mean by that? is that a microsoft term?
if you want fine-tuned spacing between lines in libreoffice you can play with font-size. that will actually change the amount of space between lines (even if there is no text). if you want to adjust spacing between letters, there is a control for that too.
caveat is that you should do none of this until you are at the typesetting phase
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>>25316010
I'm so glad the exposition is brief and concise. It's not at all exhaustive or over-the-top or self-insistent. The world of the character, his immediate surroundings, is all that matters and it's all that's illustrated.
It might be because of the translation, but the repetitiveness of "laughed" and "cried" made the emotional beats same-y and redundant. It's more about being sad/showing sadness rather than fighting a difficult/hopeless battle which naturally produces sadness. Without a variety of words to specify the nature of the crying, I can't tell how the first tear and the last tear are different.
But yeah, the overall narrative direction is solid. It's clear what the characters want, what they don't have, and what they're afraid of.
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>>25316241
>>25316243
word and letter spacing. there is no control for that
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>>25316528
>>25316284
>>25316243
>>25316241
Microspacing refers to justified text, in the insertion of characters smaller than a spacebar character to better fit justified text more densely. Fuck do people use search engines anymore?
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>>25316908
Here, I spent the last 10 minutes making this diagram.
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>>25316910
Added additional information
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>>25315982
>>25316217
Thank you for the kind feedback.
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>>25316995
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>>25316668
>>25316719
You people haven't even read my book yet, you have no idea how good it is
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>>25316268
Yea, lexicon is my biggest weakness I think. Lot of the book and character interaction is intentionally based on small movements and silence but it translated into too many sighs and too many looks etc. This will need polishing in the second draft (not by replacing the sighs, looks, laughs with synonyms but different small interactions that do not break the pacing).
However it is also partly intentional as it takes place in country and time when there was no written word. And importance of speaking/weight of words are a motif throughout the book.
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Would writing help me become a better reader as well? Like noticing story themes, etc.
I watch movies, I read books, but I don't notice things like motifs, themes, story construction, narrative etc.
I want to be able to understand that, and I also think writing is useful as a skill as well.
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>>25317251
Yes, it both made me more critical of written stuff and made me appreaciate good writing more. Especially made me appreciate Hemingway, I fell like before writing I didn't have the 'feel' for his skill of leaving shit out, saying just as little as necessary.
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>>25317324
Yup, was about to say this. Even most chapters in Anna Karenina are like 10 pages at most (3000 words). 15k words per chapter is crazy, that's not a chapter, that's a 'book 1' or 'part 1' of larger novel.
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>>25317287
this is a loaded suggestion/projection; most anyone would drop (anything) they're doing to instead work some big ambitious project (if they had the resources-- that implication alone means something)... but my writing/story is for the medium and doesn't translate like that.
i say this is loaded because if you read more and were thinking about the craft as a writer you probably wouldn't have made that assertion
not hating, just... it is what it is
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>>25317287
Eh, kinda? I have a background in filmmaking and the fact that I don't have unlimited resources means I have a lot more free time to devote to prose. But I see the interests as seperate and distinct. I'd probably find time to write lit even if I did have unlimited resources.
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>>25317651
>“This is probably a very unpopular thing to say,” the director Peter Greenaway has said, “but all film writers should be shot.”
>The provocative call to arms, although not literal arms, was made by Greenaway to an audience at the headquarters of Bafta.
>Greenaway was speaking at a ‘Life in Pictures’ retrospective event celebrating a career which has included films such as >The Draughtsman’s Contract; The Cook, the Thief, His Wife and Her Lover and The Pillow Book.
>Nearly always outspoken and controversial, the Amsterdam-based Greenaway did not disappoint at Bafta when he complained that cinema was always going “back to the bookshop” for its content.
https://www.theguardian.com/film/2016/apr/14/film-director-calls-for-i mage-based-cinema
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>>25317324
>>25317340
Stop trying to turn it into math, faggots. You could have no chapters at all, just one long block of text, and if the writing is good the book is good.
>>25317093
Do what works.
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>>25317652
I'm already rich (retired software engineer). I'm doing this for fun. It's like lottery tickets. I know most of what I create won't go anywhere, maybe none of it will, but it's more fun than gambling or day trading or whatever. And I don't have to risk any of my savings, just time, which I have plenty of.
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>>25317744
as a writer you should take more time to internalize thoughts and feelings. you aren't in it for the money, then. money is the score, or the validation that you've succeeded in a competitive creative space
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>>25317738
The first two are determined by the needs of the story, which could demand a diverse range of approches. And reader expectations don't need to be met. In fact, doing something unexpected (and well) could increase your story's impact
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>>25317744
An excerpt of Consumptive Cur relevant to your post
>Th[e] preoccupation with greatness is a very common pathology among writers and artists in general. For many, it’s not enough for their work to exist; it must also be great. What might’ve started as a passion for creation quickly devolves into a compulsion akin to that of the lottery ticket scratcher in the troubled psyches of those afflicted with such useless ambitions. Each new work, rather than a sacred expression of a rich inner life, becomes a trifling chance to make it big. This madness appears to be a maladaptation of the innate human aspiration to immortality. In his epic, Gilgamesh was one of the earliest to aspire to eternal life after experiencing the death of his friend. Being given the impossible challenge of conquering sleep, he also became one of the earliest to give up and substitute eternity for a measly written work: fool’s gold immortality.
>Gilgamesh lies dead in his grave alongside the forgotten leagues. Continued consumption of his work hasn’t and won’t change that.
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>>25317753
see,
>>25317745
writing with purpose, under constraints, is craft. no one gives a fuck about you or what you feel unless you can meet said expectation
if you don't care about communicating your story at all, you're an irrelevant minority that should probably still not fucking chime in
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>>25317764
So much this
>>25317744
Give us free money anon
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>>25317751
No, it's the money. I have enough to support myself, but if I had more that'd be even better. I could take my retired parents on a nice vacation or something. On the off chance anything I write gets produced, I'm not even sure I'd want my real name attached to it.
>>25317757
I never had much of a rich inner life. I'm not one of those people who can't visualize an apple, I think very visually actually, but there isn't much else going on emotionally or intellectually. I can be introspective, but there isn't anything to find. Maybe I'm misinterpreting this excerpt though.
>>25317764
>>25317771
Sorry. I have a lot saved up, but it's only enough to support myself for another 40-50 years without having to work. That's it.
And like I said, I'm trying screenplays. I'm focusing on an action one right now, but I have a few other ideas I've already started: a spy thriller, a horror one, a sports action one, and a thing about porn. Basically... schlock.
Fwiw, I'm also trying to create music as well. That might be going a bit better than the writing. I also tried being a video game streamer, but I'm not good at gaming and I'm a natural charisma black hole.
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>>25317802
You have a rich inner life, anon. You are utterly unique and have thoughts and ideas that nobody else has had or will have ever again. Try taping into that.
Or don't and just make slop for casual consumption. You do you.
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>>25317762
>>25317767
okay, well... i think you guys get me. that it's important to 'communicate' a story, and what that entails. if you are making an argument for post-modern writing then... uh, save it. TAKE A HIKE, even. it's not helping
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>>25317512
Write until you find it fun. Then keep going until it's good
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What's a good hook/central plot point for a work that thematizes building? I am tired of writing and reading about being stuck in the past? I especially refer to fantasy settings. I keep coming back to isekai's typical trope of building a community or town or city, but I think thats not that interesting and a low hanging fruit.
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>>25317938
>>25317929
Okay, I am intrigued of what the original could be about, but I think i should clarify:
With "About building" I didn't mean "construction projects" but instead building something up, anything. Less about architecture and more about future prospects. And now, Im not talking about cultivation stuff either.
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>>25317929
>>25317950
The TV shows "Silicon Valley" and "Halt and Catch Fire" are about building tech companies. They both focus more on actual engineering and building side of the stories rather than the business side (which you see more often). The HCF finale even has a scene where two characters discussmaybe doing it all again, starting a new company, "building something from nothing". Maybe watch those for ideas.
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>>25317996
Thanks for the tip, but it's still not about construction or engineering. I was referring to building something up like a community or life. I see lots of fiction about people trying to fix their past mistakes or find redemption or something like that.
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>>25317808
Maybe I don't. Maybe I don't understand what you're saying. It's fine I guess.
>>25317814
My brain is too fried from working in tech. I can only think in short segments now. I get flashes of visual inspiration, but no deeper thoughts around them. Then I have to spend weeks trying to construct something around that.
>>25317817
Were you ever offered work to develop scripts for other concepts or adaptations, not your own original stuff?
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>>25318029
>Were you ever offered work to develop scripts for other concepts or adaptations, not your own original stuff?
I had no interest in that and made it known. Anything I put my name on will be my own original piece.
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>>25317929
There needs to be a motivation for the character to want to build a community. The common one is regret over the past (common in isekai) that becomes building a found (or actual) family that grows into a community (Mushoku, Slime).
One you could explore is the need for a place to belong. This could be because for whatever reason, the protagonist loses his original community, or the solid foundation on which the MC stood and relied upon (beliefs, for example). This can range from concrete (an actual place to live, a house where the MC is comfortable), to as abstract as you want. The search for a place to belong is something that perhaps it is never satisfied. Or perhaps it is the search itself that becomes the "place" of belonging. Vinland Saga deals with this (the ideal "Vinland").
Currently listening to something about religion, so here's a prompt for you:
MC belonged to a community with a focus in religion(family, town, whatever). Given certain revelations or interactions within or outside the community, the MC has a crisis in faith, which impacts their relationship with their community. The MC can then try to move on in different ways, depending on how they seek to either rebuild, change, or discard their religious beliefs, and how to regain a sense of belonging.